Tag Archives: Swim

Chapter 6: Mr. Swimtastic

We stare through the glass door looking in every direction possible for any signs of danger.

“Looks clear to me,” Caleb whispers. I slowly open the door and peak out, still nothing. Then putting my right foot out, and my left foot out, I step onto the wet tile floor. I stand there alone, the others inside the door still awaiting my signal. As I’m about to motion to them I stop, there is a shuffling sound to my right. I turn to look and see the lifeguard station collapsed but moving. I motion for everyone to wait as I make my way towards it, floaties and other swim gear piled alongside it covering whatever was causing the movement. I put the sword I’m currently holding back into its sheath and quickly remove the longest one; with this I have the longest reach. I hold it out in front of me; I am now only two and a half steps away from the moving who-knows-what, I reach out with my weapon and using the tips toss some of the debris into the air. I quickly jump back as the unknown lurches towards me revealing itself. I find myself looking straight at a very muscular lifeguard zombie, a pair of swim-trunks covering his lower half with their brand name reading: “Mr. Swimtastic.”

My friends must have noticed my surprise because only a second later and they are by my side weapons at the ready. I hold out my arms to show them everything is ok and they stop to view the oddity in front of me. The man is trapped under a heavy enough object that he cannot get out and simply reaches for us his eyes glazed back in undead blindness, he cannot see only hear; mindlessly he shifts, occasionally kicking his legs in an attempt to remove the wreckage that rests atop him.

“Hm,” we all hum as we watch the creature struggle.

“What should we do with him?” I ask looking around for ideas. Caleb steps forward and reaches into his jacket and pulls out one of several large and well-sharpened knives.

“I got this,” he claims as he raises the knife high above his head reaching out as much as possible to avoid getting too close to the enemy below. When he decides he is at the right spot he lets go of the blade; we watch as it falls towards the monster’s head. There’s a quick clinking noise as his blade lightly grazes Mr. Swimtastic and then his the floor; the zombie, being attracted to sound, quickly throws his head towards the blade and begins to gnash his teeth in its direction trying to get a bite at his would-be attacker.

“Ha! Try again!” Quinn scoffs at Caleb as his friend stares sadly down at his failure.

“Now I can’t get my knife back,” Caleb lightly cries realizing that reaching for that knife would potentially get him bitten which was the last thing he wanted to do. Suddenly we hear a noise; a loud grinding coming that echoed through the room, bouncing off of every wall. The echo kept us from being able to pinpoint the location of the noise but looking around we knew it obviously wasn’t anything in here.

“C’mon,” Ben shouts rushing back towards the changing rooms.

“Wait what about this guy?” Caleb stands pointing at the undead lifeguard. I stop in my rush to follow Quinn and Ben sword raised above my head and slice down quickly lopping off the monster’s neck and everything attached.

“There,” I shout. Caleb bends to pick up his knife while I return to following the other two, just before leaving I grab a towel off the shelf by the changing room door containing hundreds of towels; I grab one and use it to wipe off my blade before tossing it and heading out of the pool room.

We quickly make our way back through the locker room and into the front lobby.

“I’m guessing it came from upstairs,” Ben shout back to us as we run up to the second floor. There’s no need to be quiet now, any undead in the area had to have heard that sound and are going to be focusing on that rather than us.

As we reach the top of the stairwell we find ourselves on the cardio floor offering ellipticals, stationery bikes, treadmills, and other similar equipment. We take a quick look around and see nothing but the equipment.

“It must be the next floor,” Ben states already spinning around and stepping onto the first step. Suddenly we hear it again, a loud grinding noise.

“Is that a blender?” Caleb asked as we rush up the staircase.

We make it to floor number three, the top floor of the building. Inside we see weight-lifting equipment: bars, lifts, and weights all neatly organized throughout the room. We come around the corner and see something at the far end of the room, the smoothie bar. As we come closer we notice movement behind it, then the noise again.

“Gggrrrrrrr,” we all jump in surprise. The sound WAS a blender and someone behind the bar was operating it. We approached weapons drawn and at the ready awaiting any sudden movement. The person moved quickly, too quickly for a zombie; grabbing a banana, pouring a small amount of protein into the blender in front of him, then spinning around to grab some more fruit causing him to find himself staring right into our eyes.

“MICHAEL!”

Most Useful Pokemon in Real-Life (Gen 1)

So I saw a post on Twitter the other day about someone’s list of Pokemon they thought would be useful in real life, and I thought to myself, ‘that’s a cool idea,’ but as I started reading I was disappointed at some of the reasoning for their choices. Some of them didn’t make a whole lot of sense and others were so generic, so I decided I would do my own blog post on which Pokemon I would want in real life based on their real life practicality.

Transportation

1. Pidgeot

Pidgeot

Pidgeot is one of many flying Pokemon in the games, but the positive aspect of Pidgeot that outdoes other flying Pokemon is that it can hit speeds faster than the speed of sound! You could get anywhere quicker than an airplane on the back of a Pidgeot, and you could go anywhere!

2. Poliwrath

Poliwrath

Following the transportation aspect, if you can’t have a Pidgeot to fly over the seas or you want to do some ocean exploration Poliwrath is the way to go. One can ride the back of this incredibly muscular Pokemon who can smash through the waves in your way. Also, with it’s strength you never have to worry about bullies again since Poliwrath can simply beat them into Submission (see what I did there).

3. Alakazam

Alakazam

Bottom-line if you’re running late to work or wherever and you don’t have the time to enjoy the scenery or explore like you would with the previously mentioned Pokemon, then Alakazam is the choice for you. With Alakazam one can quickly teleport anywhere needed and in an instant. On top of that Alakazam has all those other Psychic based powers that would allow it to move things with it’s mind (never have to lift heavy furniture etc again) or hypnotize others (or even you if you’re having trouble sleeping or something). Finally, Alakazam is incredibly smart with an IQ of around 5,000 and a photographic memory you would never have to worry about getting things wrong again (great for helping you with your homework and even better it could communicate answers telepathically so the teacher will never know).

Manual Labor

4. Machamp

Machamp

Why ever lift anything again if you have a Machamp, it can lift a freaking mountain if it wanted to! Machamp even has 4 hands allowing it to pick up four heavy things at once helping you to get your work done even faster. And of course he makes for a great body guard, I’d like to see someone go up against Machamp in a fight!

5. Scyther

Scyther

Think about it! Scyther has swords for arms and a great sense of accuracy to go with it. Never worry about dicing your vegetables or slicing food in general with Scyther around. Don’t want to chop wood for the fire? That’s fine Scyther can make quick work out of logs, plants, heck even metal!

6. Rhydon

Rhydon

Aside from it’s strength and armor that covers its body, Rhydon has that awesome horn on the front of his face. This horn is great for drilling nice big holes, ever went to dig a hole no need for that anymore because Rhydon can do it for you!

Making Money

7. Meowth

Meowth

Who else is better for making money than Meowth? I mean the Pokemon can create coins! It’s a great collector of shiny objects, and some (specifically our good friend Meowth from the show) are capable of human speech.

8. Chansey

Chansey

Not just because Chansey makes a great nurse, the eggs that Chansey carries with it and lays several of a day are said to be incredibly nutritious as well as tasty. Start selling these and you’ll be rich in no time.

9. Jolteon

Jolteon

Everyone uses electricity, except like Amish people I suppose. So that means there’s obviously a high need for electricity. Jolteon is able to amplify and store this energy which can either be used by you to cut down on your electric bill, or to sell back to the electricity company for cash. With several Jolteons you could probably do both!

10. Ditto

Ditto

Ever needed two of yourself for a job, Ditto can do that! With Ditto’s transform ability which allows it to copy the genetic structure of anything making itself look like that person, object, etc anything is possible. Use Ditto to mess with people or get twice as much done it’s all up to you.